...a thin line between Life and Death...

A normal forwarded emailed bugged me the whole day… and the first image that came to my mind the moment I finished reading it was…. my Kiddo…

And the incident which happened recently haunt me again and again and again...

9 June 2006, 6.45 a.m

What an annoying sound!!

HE mumbled. Reluctantly, HIS hand was moving frantically towards the sound, searching for the gadget, and to put an end to the unbearable sound. But it was not the morning call music that HE was ONCE so familiar with.

It was an incoming call.

The screen on the tiny gadget showed a familiar name. SOMEONE whom HE hasn’t spoken to since the last immature message HE had sent to her.

“Hello…?”

“Is my Chris there?”

“What’s wrong?”

“IS CHRIS THERE? CAN YOU PLEASE PASS THE PHONE TO HER?”

With my soul half here and half in La-La Land, I have no idea who it was but I took the call..in a creaky voice.

“…Cheh…” she started to cry like nobody’s business.. that voice.. suddenly I felt my heart stopped pounding and my world stopped turning on its orbit.. total silence..

“WHAT’S WRONG? ARE YOU OKAY? WHAT HAPPENED?”

There were like, godzillions of BAD thoughts that came to mind… I was supposed to join the outing but something came up and I didn’t go back that weekend…


Finally, both calmed down and She related to me what just happened…

…the Girls-nite-out.. the Accident… the Wrecked-Car..

She was still in the state of shock. And her main concern of the aftermath irritated me the most - the damages to the Car!! I know it meant everything to HER... but hey, all I want to know right now is HOW ARE YOU? I was like asking her for a hundred times “ARE YOU OK?” and she was going on and on about the problematic wrecked metal!! sorry..

SHE was upset. Scared. Confused. Shocked. Hurt. TRAUMATISED. And I remember raising my voice to her, asking for a firm answer about Her well-being!! What a bitch , huh?

“I AM OK... .”

That’s all I care and that’s the ONLY feedback that I wanna hear from YOU…

I sensed the mixed up feelings in HER. How is SHE going to tell our parents all these? They are dead against the Clubbing idea since… the day we adapt this particular disturbing word in our lifestyle? Will the Insurance cover the cost of the damages? What if? What if? What ifs!!~

At that moment itself, I felt like catching the next available flight home and to give Her a BIG TEDDY HUG!!

*HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS*


Here I am, sound asleep in my cozy crib. And Mum was trying hard to ignore Dad’s magnificent orchestral snores. And the possibility of Her lying motionless on the tar that night was…. So close… so freaking close..

I almost lost Her.

I’M SORRY FOR BEING A BIATCH AT THAT PARTICULAR MOMENT and for NOT being there.. and I LOVE YOU VERY, VERY MUCH.

"..never look at what you've lost, always look at what you've got..."

..and I am glad to have you around this life, and hoped you'll be there too, in many more lifetime to come..

the missing link...

Could there be some fuzziness to my current life’s logic? It's fine to look at the bigger picture, but I may want to ask for help with the finer details..

GOD,WHERE ARE YOU?!?!

NO ANSWER.

Sometimes, life felt EMPTY. I just can’t find that missing piece to complete the jigsaw puzzle of my life. Maybe what I need is a lifestyle upgrade. Why insist on living in a certain LIFESTYLE when I can afford -- and deserve -- so much more? Maybe it’s really time to let go of the past… or present, for my case, and see just how good I can have it in the unknown future?

Well, it’s about time to really get the little ass up and do something about it rather than to ponder and wonder of the WHAT Ifs…


Ghost from the Past

Someone from my past has been on my mind lately…. The universe works in mysterious ways – just have to cross paths with them when I least expected it too.. It has been like ages now, since we had coffee and all.. Still looked and smell the same...

Hmmm… should I give destiny a nudge and send an email or call?

Nyah, maybe not.

Low life retards!!~

Some people just don’t know when to quit!! They just don't geddit!

These chunk of sadists come to you with the biggest messed up shit they can ever produce, begging for you to help them and when you finally help them clean it up, they got the cheek to just throw the whole truck of their dirty laundries on you!! Unethically piece of SH!T!!~

SPLATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT !!~

"Just because SOMEONE wants you take on more responsibility doesn't mean you have to say YES!" For sure, I can handle it so damn well, but that's not what matters... I would galdly do it, even if YOU get all the credits, medals and the trophies - because YOU know so well that I am so DARN good [otherwise you wouldn't have even bother to come to me in the first place, right?]..

But right now, it's all about keeping MY life in balance!! And if YOU think that your life is so miserable, shit and all, why not try solving it instead of complaining and shoving it to others? Better still, just hand in your Letter and there shall be eternal universal peace!!

To that particular person who doesn’t have a life, GET ONE FROM eBAY and stay miles away from mine!!

Screw-up Retards...

...let's cheers to that!!..

You Will Die at Age 64

You're pretty average when it comes to how you live... And how you'll die as well.

What Age Will You Die?

...need to party even HARDER now that my days are numbered...

...about mE...

Your Inner Child Is Sad

You're a very sensitive soul. You haven't grown that thick skin that most adults have. Easily hurt, you tend to retreat to your comfort zone. You don't let many people in - unless you've trusted them for a long time.

How Is Your Inner Child?

You Are 59% Vain

You're a little vain, but more than anything you have a healthy amount of confidence. Thinking the world of yourself is great. Just don't think less of those who aren't as pretty as you!

How Vain Are You?

You Are An Invisible Ex

You're so over your ex, you hardly even remember you have an ex You prefer leave all of the baggage behind you - far, far behind As they say, indifference is the opposite of love!

What Type of Ex Are You?

Your Seduction Style: Au Natural

You rank up there with your seduction skills, though you might not know it. That's because you're a natural at seduction. You don't realize your power! The root of your natural seduction power: your innocence and optimism. You're the type of person who happily plays around and creates a unique little world. Little do you know that your personal paradise is so appealing that it sucks people in. You find joy in everything - so is it any surprise that people find joy in you? You bring back the inner child in everyone you meet with your sincere and spontaneous ways. Your childlike (but not childish) behavior also inspires others to care for you. As a result, those who you befriend and date tend to be incredibly loyal to you.

What Kind of Seducer Are You?

...the T A R O T card...

You Are The High Priestess

You represent mystery - secrets that are yet to be revealed.You find yourself sitting between two worlds: one dark, one light.You tend to hold these two worlds in balance, reconciling the two.Open and welcoming, you invite others to learn your secrets. Your fortune: Something hidden, or latent, in your life is about to come forward.You need to pay more attention to your dreams, thoughts, intuition, and imagination.And if that involves tapping into your dark side, it will all balance out in the end.You have a lot of potential dying to be unleashed, so let those gates open!

..is it juz mE..or things are getting rather spooky lately?!?!?...

Dear Christine,

Here is your Daily horoscope
“It's so ironic, but people are always falling for you when you couldn't care less. Don't be too hasty in your judgment, however -- all this mixing and mingling might actually attract just the right person for you!!”

... that’s my horoscope reading for today….. HOW IRONIC!! Hahahaha~

Here is your couple's love horoscope

“If the two of you are willing to change, then it can happen. It's easy to get discouraged if you don't see an instant metamorphosis, but real and lasting improvements take time and unfold at their own pace..”

Okay, I am really freaking out!!


My expectations are changing, but in a happy coincidence, so are the parameters of this relationship. While the transformations will be uncomfortable at first, HE will have to adapt very quickly…


Morning was rather “CRAZY”… everyone was running here and about… rushing against the clock to get the JOB done, and only came to realized that all the effort and the trouble caused along the dreadful process was a fruitless one, at the end of the whole hoo-haa – how can you make popcorns without the corns?? Sheesh…

The intray is so EMPTY and so inviting to the extend that sparrows find it too irresistible not to make it their nesting heaven… what kind of statement is this?? Hahaha…Losing my mind again~

Anyway, I am in a very happy mood now, so heck cares… let’s just put it as everything sort of went smoothly as I have planned… so far so good…

...better the DEVIL you know...

She has made a mistake about a man.
It was not the first time and it won’t be the last.
But somewhere along the line,
she wondered what she ever saw in him in the first place…
Aaaaahhhh…
….through the rose-coloured haze of those passion-filled days,
she thought he was the one…

From the first date, he was stuck to her side.
He was ubiquitous – on the phone, at the door – sometimes it seems, simultaneously. Although at first she relished the attention,
she soon starts to feel like saying “GET A LIFE”.
But he’s got one – HERS!!

He confessed that he loved her the second time she saw him,
but he didn’t even know her then...
it was way too fast and too soon..
..it’s no basis for a healthy relationship..

All the little rows they had, just get stored away in each others hearts,
soon the anger emerged as an ammo of mega fights that kills the love they once shared, which will eventually finish it off.

The petty disagreements became more and more destructive and to the stage where conflicts of two minds can no longer be resolved.

It was not the disagreements that destroyed the the relationship;
it was their failure to tackle them..

there is NO WAY in Hell YOU are ALWAYS going to make the RIGHT choices ~

It might be in your interest to keep a watchful eye on your soulmate...

but, it is not her fault if she has her ways to charm the whole smorgasbord of men around her enormously

and or have quite a crowd of admirers around her...

You might believed that she has found the perfect, ideal partner in you, but chances are you might be WRONG...

SNOOPING AROUND and INVADING OF A PERSON'S PRIVACY

ONLY PROVES HOW RIGHT SHE IS ABOUT YOU,

and HOW WRONG YOU ARE ABOUT YOURSELF... sigh

Have more confidence in me, baby...and in yourself, too...

I really want us to work

but you are really wearing me out...

...killing all the love away...

...is HE right for you?

If you answer mostly YES to the following questions, then the GUY you're seeing is a GOOD RELATIONSHIP MATERIAL :

Do you trust him? -

Is he reliable? -

Does he make you laugh? -

Is he open about his feelings? -

Do you always have plenty to talk about? -

Does he have similiar life goals to yours? -

Do you look forward to see him whenever you're apart? -

Would you be heartbroken if he said he'd met someone else?

Answer : NO [Applicable to all of the above questions].